[Softwires] Last Call: <draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> (A YANG Data Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)) to Proposed Standard

[The IESG]

The IESG has received a request from the Softwires WG (softwire) to consider
the following document: - 'A YANG Data Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)'
<draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> as Proposed Standard

The IESG plans to make a decision in the next few weeks, and solicits final
comments on this action. Please send substantive comments to the
***@ietf.org mailing lists by 2018-02-26. Exceptionally, comments may be
sent to ***@ietf.org instead. In either case, please retain the beginning of
the Subject line to allow automated sorting.

Abstract


This document defines a YANG module for the DS-Lite Address Family
Transition Router (AFTR) and Basic Bridging BroadBand (B4) elements.

Editorial Note (To be removed by RFC Editor)

Please update these statements with the RFC number to be assigned to
this document:

o "This version of this YANG module is part of RFC XXXX;"

o "RFC XXXX: A YANG Data Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)";

o "reference: RFC XXXX"




The file can be obtained via
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/

IESG discussion can be tracked via
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/ballot/


No IPR declarations have been submitted directly on this I-D.


The document contains these normative downward references.
See RFC 3967 for additional information:
draft-ietf-opsawg-nat-yang: A YANG Module for Network Address Translation (NAT) (None - IETF stream)

[tom p.]

Some minor, mostly administrative, details

- The note to the RFC Editor asking them to replace XXXX is good. I
suggest another asking them to update the dates in the file and
revision clauses of the YANG module with the date of publication..

- Copyright is 2017

- the YANG module has six imports but no reference to where they can be
found. I suggest adding a reference clause to each import, as in e.g.
draft-ietf-netmod-syslog-model, and, since the reference clause cannot
contain a XML style reference to the Reference section of the I-D, a
further mention of these I-D/RFC in the body of the I-D, again as in
e.g.
draft-ietf-netmod-syslog-model

- RFC7223 now has a bis version which I think you should use as it is
the NMDA version - this might affect your augments, I have not delved
into that yet.

- RFC5246 is being obsoleted and ... perhaps not:-)

- RFC 6536 is being revised and will soon be in IETF Last Call

Tom Petch

----- Original Message -----
From: "The IESG" <iesg-***@ietf.org>
Sent: Monday, February 12, 2018 2:28 PM

Post by The IESG
The IESG has received a request from the Softwires WG (softwire) to consider
the following document: - 'A YANG Data Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)'
<draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> as Proposed Standard
The IESG plans to make a decision in the next few weeks, and solicits final
comments on this action. Please send substantive comments to the
the Subject line to allow automated sorting.
Abstract
This document defines a YANG module for the DS-Lite Address Family
Transition Router (AFTR) and Basic Bridging BroadBand (B4)

elements.

Post by The IESG
Editorial Note (To be removed by RFC Editor)
Please update these statements with the RFC number to be assigned to
o "This version of this YANG module is part of RFC XXXX;"
o "RFC XXXX: A YANG Data Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)";
o "reference: RFC XXXX"
The file can be obtained via
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/
IESG discussion can be tracked via

https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/ballot/

Post by The IESG
No IPR declarations have been submitted directly on this I-D.
The document contains these normative downward references.
draft-ietf-opsawg-nat-yang: A YANG Module for Network Address

Translation (NAT) (None - IETF stream)

[m***@orange.com]

Hi Tom,

Thank you for the review and comments.

Please see inline.

Cheers,
Med

-----Message d'origine-----
Envoyé : mardi 20 février 2018 12:07
Objet : Re: Last Call: <draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> (A YANG Data
Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)) to Proposed Standard
Some minor, mostly administrative, details
- The note to the RFC Editor asking them to replace XXXX is good. I
suggest another asking them to update the dates in the file and
revision clauses of the YANG module with the date of publication..

[Med] Fixed in my local copy.

- Copyright is 2017

[Med] Updated to 2018 in my local copy.

- the YANG module has six imports but no reference to where they can be
found. I suggest adding a reference clause to each import, as in e.g.
draft-ietf-netmod-syslog-model,

[Med] Happily. Done.


and, since the reference clause cannot

contain a XML style reference to the Reference section of the I-D, a
further mention of these I-D/RFC in the body of the I-D, again as in
e.g.
draft-ietf-netmod-syslog-model

[Med] Given that almost all these pointers are already mentioned in the core text, I added only a sentence to refer to RFC7224.

- RFC7223 now has a bis version which I think you should use as it is
the NMDA version - this might affect your augments, I have not delved
into that yet.

[Med] Now that the 7223bis is in the RFC Editor queue, I updated the text.

- RFC5246 is being obsoleted and ... perhaps not:-)

[Med] Yeah, but RFC5246 is part of the recommended security text for YANG modules (https://trac.ietf.org/trac/ops/wiki/yang-security-guidelines). RFC5246 will be maintained till that reco is updated.

- RFC 6536 is being revised and will soon be in IETF Last Call

[Med] Actually, it will be published as RFC8341. I updated the text accordingly.

Tom Petch
----- Original Message -----
Sent: Monday, February 12, 2018 2:28 PM

Post by The IESG
The IESG has received a request from the Softwires WG (softwire) to

consider

Post by The IESG
the following document: - 'A YANG Data Module for Dual-Stack Lite

(DS-Lite)'

Post by The IESG
<draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> as Proposed Standard
The IESG plans to make a decision in the next few weeks, and solicits

final

Post by The IESG
comments on this action. Please send substantive comments to the

be
beginning of

Post by The IESG
the Subject line to allow automated sorting.
Abstract
This document defines a YANG module for the DS-Lite Address Family
Transition Router (AFTR) and Basic Bridging BroadBand (B4)

elements.

Post by The IESG
Editorial Note (To be removed by RFC Editor)
Please update these statements with the RFC number to be assigned

to

Post by The IESG
o "This version of this YANG module is part of RFC XXXX;"
o "RFC XXXX: A YANG Data Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)";
o "reference: RFC XXXX"
The file can be obtained via
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/
IESG discussion can be tracked via

https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/ballot/

Post by The IESG
No IPR declarations have been submitted directly on this I-D.
The document contains these normative downward references.
draft-ietf-opsawg-nat-yang: A YANG Module for Network Address

Translation (NAT) (None - IETF stream)

[m***@orange.com]

Hi Tom,

FWIW, an updated version which takes into account your review is available online.

The IETF datatracker status page for this draft is:
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/

A diff from the previous version is available at:
https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-15

Cheers,
Med

-----Message d'origine-----
Envoyé : mardi 20 février 2018 14:34
À : tom p.
Objet : RE: Last Call: <draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> (A YANG Data
Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)) to Proposed Standard
Hi Tom,
Thank you for the review and comments.
Please see inline.
Cheers,
Med

-----Message d'origine-----
Envoyé : mardi 20 février 2018 12:07

softwire-

Objet : Re: Last Call: <draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> (A YANG

Data

Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)) to Proposed Standard
Some minor, mostly administrative, details
- The note to the RFC Editor asking them to replace XXXX is good. I
suggest another asking them to update the dates in the file and
revision clauses of the YANG module with the date of publication..

[Med] Fixed in my local copy.

- Copyright is 2017

[Med] Updated to 2018 in my local copy.

- the YANG module has six imports but no reference to where they can be
found. I suggest adding a reference clause to each import, as in e.g.
draft-ietf-netmod-syslog-model,

[Med] Happily. Done.
and, since the reference clause cannot

contain a XML style reference to the Reference section of the I-D, a
further mention of these I-D/RFC in the body of the I-D, again as in
e.g.
draft-ietf-netmod-syslog-model

[Med] Given that almost all these pointers are already mentioned in the core
text, I added only a sentence to refer to RFC7224.

- RFC7223 now has a bis version which I think you should use as it is
the NMDA version - this might affect your augments, I have not delved
into that yet.

[Med] Now that the 7223bis is in the RFC Editor queue, I updated the text.

- RFC5246 is being obsoleted and ... perhaps not:-)

[Med] Yeah, but RFC5246 is part of the recommended security text for YANG
modules (https://trac.ietf.org/trac/ops/wiki/yang-security-guidelines).
RFC5246 will be maintained till that reco is updated.

- RFC 6536 is being revised and will soon be in IETF Last Call

[Med] Actually, it will be published as RFC8341. I updated the text accordingly.

Tom Petch
----- Original Message -----
Sent: Monday, February 12, 2018 2:28 PM

Post by The IESG
The IESG has received a request from the Softwires WG (softwire) to

consider

Post by The IESG
the following document: - 'A YANG Data Module for Dual-Stack Lite

(DS-Lite)'

Post by The IESG
<draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> as Proposed Standard
The IESG plans to make a decision in the next few weeks, and solicits

final

Post by The IESG
comments on this action. Please send substantive comments to the

be
beginning of

Post by The IESG
the Subject line to allow automated sorting.
Abstract
This document defines a YANG module for the DS-Lite Address Family
Transition Router (AFTR) and Basic Bridging BroadBand (B4)

elements.

Post by The IESG
Editorial Note (To be removed by RFC Editor)
Please update these statements with the RFC number to be assigned

to

Post by The IESG
o "This version of this YANG module is part of RFC XXXX;"
o "RFC XXXX: A YANG Data Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)";
o "reference: RFC XXXX"
The file can be obtained via
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/
IESG discussion can be tracked via

https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/ballot/

Post by The IESG
No IPR declarations have been submitted directly on this I-D.
The document contains these normative downward references.
draft-ietf-opsawg-nat-yang: A YANG Module for Network Address

Translation (NAT) (None - IETF stream)

[tom p.]

Med

Two thoughts.

You have a reference clause for RFC8343 which is good, but it does not
appear in the Reference section of the I-D which I think it should. It
then needs to appear in the text part of the I-D lest you get a unused
reference warning, perhaps at the start of section 3, or else in section
2. (I like the approach of rfc7227bis which lists all the imports
together).

Second, when you say
" Also, update this sentence with the RFC number to be assigned to this
document:
o "RFC YYYY: A YANG Module for Network Address Translation (NAT) and
Network Prefix Translation (NPT)"
'this document' could be misread as
draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang
rather than
I-D.ietf-opsawg-nat-yang
I suggest replacing 'this document' by ' ietf-opsawg-nat-yang'
I know, picky, but I like the RFC Editor to have to think as little as
possible so they can concentrate on what they do so well.

Tom Petch

----- Original Message -----
From: <***@orange.com>
Sent: Tuesday, February 27, 2018 7:13 AM

Post by m***@orange.com
Hi Tom,
FWIW, an updated version which takes into account your review is available online.
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/
https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-15
Cheers,
Med

-----Message d'origine-----
Envoyé : mardi 20 février 2018 14:34
À : tom p.

softwire-

Post by m***@orange.com

Objet : RE: Last Call: <draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> (A

YANG Data

Post by m***@orange.com

Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)) to Proposed Standard
Hi Tom,
Thank you for the review and comments.
Please see inline.
Cheers,
Med

-----Message d'origine-----
Envoyé : mardi 20 février 2018 12:07

softwire-

Objet : Re: Last Call: <draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> (A

YANG

Post by m***@orange.com

Data

Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)) to Proposed Standard
Some minor, mostly administrative, details
- The note to the RFC Editor asking them to replace XXXX is good.

I

Post by m***@orange.com

suggest another asking them to update the dates in the file and
revision clauses of the YANG module with the date of publication..

[Med] Fixed in my local copy.

- Copyright is 2017

[Med] Updated to 2018 in my local copy.

- the YANG module has six imports but no reference to where they can be
found. I suggest adding a reference clause to each import, as in e.g.
draft-ietf-netmod-syslog-model,

[Med] Happily. Done.
and, since the reference clause cannot

contain a XML style reference to the Reference section of the I-D, a
further mention of these I-D/RFC in the body of the I-D, again as in
e.g.
draft-ietf-netmod-syslog-model

[Med] Given that almost all these pointers are already mentioned in the core
text, I added only a sentence to refer to RFC7224.

- RFC7223 now has a bis version which I think you should use as it is
the NMDA version - this might affect your augments, I have not delved
into that yet.

[Med] Now that the 7223bis is in the RFC Editor queue, I updated the text.

- RFC5246 is being obsoleted and ... perhaps not:-)

[Med] Yeah, but RFC5246 is part of the recommended security text for YANG
modules

(https://trac.ietf.org/trac/ops/wiki/yang-security-guidelines).

Post by m***@orange.com

RFC5246 will be maintained till that reco is updated.

- RFC 6536 is being revised and will soon be in IETF Last Call

[Med] Actually, it will be published as RFC8341. I updated the text accordingly.

Tom Petch
----- Original Message -----
Sent: Monday, February 12, 2018 2:28 PM

Post by The IESG
The IESG has received a request from the Softwires WG (softwire) to

consider

Post by The IESG
the following document: - 'A YANG Data Module for Dual-Stack Lite

(DS-Lite)'

Post by The IESG
<draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> as Proposed Standard
The IESG plans to make a decision in the next few weeks, and solicits

final

Post by The IESG
comments on this action. Please send substantive comments to the

be
beginning of

Post by The IESG
the Subject line to allow automated sorting.
Abstract
This document defines a YANG module for the DS-Lite Address Family
Transition Router (AFTR) and Basic Bridging BroadBand (B4)

elements.

Post by The IESG
Editorial Note (To be removed by RFC Editor)
Please update these statements with the RFC number to be assigned

to

Post by The IESG
o "This version of this YANG module is part of RFC XXXX;"
o "RFC XXXX: A YANG Data Module for Dual-Stack Lite

(DS-Lite)";

Post by m***@orange.com

Post by The IESG
o "reference: RFC XXXX"
The file can be obtained via

https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/

Post by m***@orange.com

Post by The IESG
IESG discussion can be tracked via

https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/ballot/

Post by m***@orange.com

Post by The IESG
No IPR declarations have been submitted directly on this I-D.
The document contains these normative downward references.
draft-ietf-opsawg-nat-yang: A YANG Module for Network Address

Translation (NAT) (None - IETF stream)

[m***@orange.com]

Re-,

Thank you for double checking. Much appreciated!

Please see inline.

Cheers,
Med

-----Message d'origine-----
Envoyé : mardi 27 février 2018 13:37
À : BOUCADAIR Mohamed IMT/OLN
Objet : Re: Last Call: <draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> (A YANG Data
Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)) to Proposed Standard
Med
Two thoughts.
You have a reference clause for RFC8343 which is good, but it does not
appear in the Reference section of the I-D which I think it should.

[Med] Hmm. We do have such entry:

[I-D.ietf-netmod-rfc7223bis]
Bjorklund, M., "A YANG Data Model for Interface
Management", draft-ietf-netmod-rfc7223bis-03 (work in
progress), January 2018.

It

then needs to appear in the text part of the I-D lest you get a unused
reference warning, perhaps at the start of section 3, or else in section
2. (I like the approach of rfc7227bis which lists all the imports
together).
Second, when you say
" Also, update this sentence with the RFC number to be assigned to this
o "RFC YYYY: A YANG Module for Network Address Translation (NAT) and
Network Prefix Translation (NPT)"
'this document' could be misread as
draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang
rather than
I-D.ietf-opsawg-nat-yang
I suggest replacing 'this document' by ' ietf-opsawg-nat-yang'
I know, picky, but I like the RFC Editor to have to think as little as
possible so they can concentrate on what they do so well.

[Med] If you think this can be misinterpreted, I'm happy to change it. I will fix it in my local copy but will wait for other comments from the IESG review before releasing a new version.

Tom Petch
----- Original Message -----
Sent: Tuesday, February 27, 2018 7:13 AM

Post by m***@orange.com
Hi Tom,
FWIW, an updated version which takes into account your review is

available online.

Post by m***@orange.com
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/
https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-15
Cheers,
Med

-----Message d'origine-----
Envoyé : mardi 20 février 2018 14:34
À : tom p.

softwire-

Post by m***@orange.com

Objet : RE: Last Call: <draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> (A

YANG Data

Post by m***@orange.com

Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)) to Proposed Standard
Hi Tom,
Thank you for the review and comments.
Please see inline.
Cheers,
Med

-----Message d'origine-----
Envoyé : mardi 20 février 2018 12:07

softwire-

Objet : Re: Last Call: <draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> (A

YANG

Post by m***@orange.com

Data

Module for Dual-Stack Lite (DS-Lite)) to Proposed Standard
Some minor, mostly administrative, details
- The note to the RFC Editor asking them to replace XXXX is good.

I

Post by m***@orange.com

suggest another asking them to update the dates in the file and
revision clauses of the YANG module with the date of publication..

[Med] Fixed in my local copy.

- Copyright is 2017

[Med] Updated to 2018 in my local copy.

- the YANG module has six imports but no reference to where they

can be

Post by m***@orange.com

found. I suggest adding a reference clause to each import, as in

e.g.

Post by m***@orange.com

draft-ietf-netmod-syslog-model,

[Med] Happily. Done.
and, since the reference clause cannot

contain a XML style reference to the Reference section of the I-D,

a

Post by m***@orange.com

further mention of these I-D/RFC in the body of the I-D, again as

in

Post by m***@orange.com

e.g.
draft-ietf-netmod-syslog-model

[Med] Given that almost all these pointers are already mentioned in

the core

Post by m***@orange.com

text, I added only a sentence to refer to RFC7224.

- RFC7223 now has a bis version which I think you should use as it

is

Post by m***@orange.com

the NMDA version - this might affect your augments, I have not

delved

Post by m***@orange.com

into that yet.

[Med] Now that the 7223bis is in the RFC Editor queue, I updated the

text.

Post by m***@orange.com

- RFC5246 is being obsoleted and ... perhaps not:-)

[Med] Yeah, but RFC5246 is part of the recommended security text for

YANG

Post by m***@orange.com

modules

(https://trac.ietf.org/trac/ops/wiki/yang-security-guidelines).

Post by m***@orange.com

RFC5246 will be maintained till that reco is updated.

- RFC 6536 is being revised and will soon be in IETF Last Call

[Med] Actually, it will be published as RFC8341. I updated the text accordingly.

Tom Petch
----- Original Message -----
Sent: Monday, February 12, 2018 2:28 PM

Post by The IESG
The IESG has received a request from the Softwires WG (softwire)

to

Post by m***@orange.com

consider

Post by The IESG
the following document: - 'A YANG Data Module for Dual-Stack

Lite

Post by m***@orange.com

(DS-Lite)'

Post by The IESG
<draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang-14.txt> as Proposed Standard
The IESG plans to make a decision in the next few weeks, and

solicits

Post by m***@orange.com

final

Post by The IESG
comments on this action. Please send substantive comments to the

comments may

Post by m***@orange.com

be
beginning of

Post by The IESG
the Subject line to allow automated sorting.
Abstract
This document defines a YANG module for the DS-Lite Address

Family

Post by m***@orange.com

Post by The IESG
Transition Router (AFTR) and Basic Bridging BroadBand (B4)

elements.

Post by The IESG
Editorial Note (To be removed by RFC Editor)
Please update these statements with the RFC number to be

assigned

Post by m***@orange.com

to

Post by The IESG
o "This version of this YANG module is part of RFC XXXX;"
o "RFC XXXX: A YANG Data Module for Dual-Stack Lite

(DS-Lite)";

Post by m***@orange.com

Post by The IESG
o "reference: RFC XXXX"
The file can be obtained via

https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/

Post by m***@orange.com

Post by The IESG
IESG discussion can be tracked via

https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-yang/ballot/

Post by m***@orange.com

Post by The IESG
No IPR declarations have been submitted directly on this I-D.
The document contains these normative downward references.
draft-ietf-opsawg-nat-yang: A YANG Module for Network

Address

Post by m***@orange.com

Translation (NAT) (None - IETF stream)